IPL - The Indian Phony League

So on this last and final day of the IPL it is going through some rough weather. And my friend called me to discuss the future of this mega (bucks) event and seek my views on the way forward.

(Frankly it doesn't pay to be known as a strategic consultant who can connect the dots... most of time its these freebies...)

My Friend: So what do you think will happen now that the CSK team's CEO has been arrested.

Me: Do you know that he is not the CEO....evidence now indicates that it was all a hoax, he never was part of the team, he never went for matches, those photos were all morphed. It wasn't him that went for bidding as you know most south Indian gentlemen with glasses all look the same especially if they wear dark T-Shirts.

My Friend: Ah.. so you are saying that Board of does not have to sack the team, break up the franchise etc.

Me: How ridiculous can you get. it would be impossible to break up this franchise. After all their owners are in the cement business and they have built solid foundations that will take years to chip away. As you know the BCCI itself has poured the mix in for so many years now that it has many of its limbs stuck in that concrete.

My Friend: I'm told that the finals will be a walk over and Mumbai Indians will find that there is no team to play against.

Me: That's not true my friend, just a few hours ago the BCCI amended the IPCL clause 12.1 to state that the President has the veto power on this and if he feels deep in his heart that nothing is wrong then its ok to let them continue to play.

My Friend: Ok ok but since you brought the topic up what will happen to the BCCI President

Me: He will go from denial to dismissal. He will deny all wrong doing, all knowledge of any wrong doing and drag this thing for some time. Then our central government will step in and force the issue viz offer a side deal and ask him to step down which he then will saying that he has to focus on his business blah blah. He will also try and make this a South vs North/West kinda fight to try and garner southern sympathies but it ain't gonna work.

My Friend: And what will happen to the IPL?

Me: It will become IFL my friend. They will rename it as Indian Fantasy League bury the past, find new suckers (sorry sponsors) to cough up money, the bookies will go back to business. There will be a new format wherein each team will also have a film producer and script writer. These folks will be given one game per team and the mystery would be that we don't know which game it is that their story is being played out. There will be good guys and villains, item numbers instead of cheer leaders, brothers playing in opposing sides and so on.

And lets be clear we Indians will love it; we who are a country of fun loving people (possibly of ostrich descent) anyway living in a world that is full of movies, reality television which is completely unreal and news channels which are like soap operas. All to forget the muck and corruption in which we live.

Jai Ho.